Tribe Nutrition: How Your Circle Influences Your Plate

“ It takes a tribe to raise a human “ - Yural Nohah Harari

A Journey From Tribes to Western Civilizations

In his book Sapiens Yuval Noah Harari gives a brilliant explanation of man’s prehistory. Current evidence suggests that our species evolved in Africa 2.5 million years ago. Our ancestors lived in small groups, surviving as hunters and gatherers. They gathered plants, seeds, and nuts, occasionally hunting for lean meats. These early humans were strong, healthy, and intelligent, largely free from the diseases of modern life.

We maintained this lifestyle until the agricultural revolution around 12,000 years ago. This transformation not only altered our diet but also changed our social structure. Before agriculture, humans rarely interacted with individuals outside their tribe. However, with the advent of farming came villages, cities, and suburbs. This shift also introduced trade, money, and the concept of an economy. Subsequently, markets, restaurants, bars, takeout, and food courts emerged. While our ancestors struggled to stave off starvation, today we face the challenge of obesity.

Tribal communities still exist in modern times, often maintaining dietary habits similar to those of our ancestors. Unfortunately, we often view these tribes with condescension, considering them primitive. We’re no different from early western civilizations who judged the habits of those living in tribes. We have assumed superiority not only because of our technology and lifestyle but because of the way we eat. Ironically, we are the ones poisoning ourselves. 

Modern Day Health Challenges

Several regions in the world, though modern or well-connected, maintain significantly healthier diets than the Western world. Dan Buettner highlights many of these areas in his book Blue Zones, where people live notably longer than average. Their longevity is partly attributed to their nutrition. Ideally, we would aim to create our own personal 'blue zone' in our current environment. However, we must acknowledge that unlike our ancestors, we face challenges they never did.

Mark Sisson, the author of The Primal Blueprint, likes to refer to his ancestor as “Gronk.” He shares that Gronk did not need an abundance of will power because he did not have an abundance of choices. He did not have to avoid the bagel or donut shop on his way out to hunt in the morning. He wasn’t tempted by fast food on his way home even though he knew there was fresh meat waiting. He had plants, seeds, and nuts and did not have to deal with the mental battle of avoiding processed wheat and sugar.

When creating our personal nutrition plan, we should weigh the positives and negatives of all our tribes. If we don’t personally know people who have their bases covered and live a healthy lifestyle, we can at least research those who do. These individuals are content with their eating habits. They don't constantly crave other foods or complain about restrictions. They enjoy how they feel, and many are pleased with their appearance. Only a small percentage are athletes or celebrities who are paid to look healthy, and only a few are narcissists. We know living a healthy life can be achieved because they do it. Like riding a bike it’s become second nature to simply avoid the pitfalls and obstacles over time. We are all capable of this .

Unfortunately in our modern day world there are too many unhealthy options that are cheap and readily available. While we all possess some degree of willpower and desire to be healthy, each person's situation is vastly different. We are far from being on a level playing field; some are skiing downhill while others are climbing Everest.

How Your Tribe Impacts Your Nutrition

Your Tribe

Your tribe starts with yourself. You begin as a wolfpack of one. Start by defining your own nutrition plan. If you live alone it’s simple. You have more control over the temptations around your own home and you can create your own nutritional safe space. If you focus on only keeping healthy options in your home you’re already set up for success.

Your Family Tribe

Expanding your tribe to include family can complicate things further. Some are fortunate to be born into a healthy family, a gift most Americans do not have. In such families, you not only have access to good food options but also role models and a knowledge base that many lack.

Having a spouse committed to a healthy lifestyle and young children under your care is even better than going at it alone. However, if your spouse is not on board, you may find yourself with fewer healthy food options at home, posing a test to your willpower.

If you have older children and one day you announce that junk food is going out and healthier options are coming in, expect some resistance at first. I still remember when my dad declared we'd no longer have sugary cereals like Frosted Flakes, Apple Jacks, Fruit Loops, or Sugar Smacks. I ended up sprinkling table sugar on my Wheaties and sneaking Pop-Tarts, hoping he wouldn't notice.

Most healthy households will need to compromise, especially at the start. How much you compromise is up to you. While you probably won’t get away with as many compromise meals as your teenage son eats, he won’t be able to eat like that forever either.

Your Professional Tribe

Your next tribe are your coworkers. For professionals this can be a challenge. Break rooms are often filled with junk foods like bagels, donuts, cookies, and cakes. When you’re tight on time vending machines may be the only option and most of the options inside them typically offer no real nutrition at all. In work settings it’s not uncommon to eat out or order carryout with your coworkers. This can be a nice break in the day but becomes a further obstacle if you are the only one committed to leading a healthy lifestyle. 

For some people eating out for business meetings is a key part of their job. There are always healthy options on any menu, but it’s up to you to make the choice between ordering nachos versus a salad. Although the workplace has obstacles, there’s a simple solution. Consider only eating what you bring from home. If you need to eat out for work do not mix work with pleasure. Choose healthy foods when eating at a work meal and give yourself more freedom when going out with friends or family. 

For many years work was my nutritional weakness. My wife always ate healthy so breakfast and dinner were usually safe. Work was where things fell apart for me. I wanted to be healthy but the hospitals were filled with fast foods and unhealthy snacks. Cue Allanis Morrisette, “A little too ironic, don't you think.“

My office was like every other office. There was always food everywhere, and finally one day I had enough and made a rule. I said to myself, “I only eat what I bring from home. I am not going to eat office delivery pizza but I WILL eat pizza at a restaurant with my family. I won't have cookies or cake lying around the breakroom but I WILL eat homemade cookies made by someone in my family.”

Your Friend Tribe

The next tribe are your friends. For most people with families the occasional meal with friends will not get them off track. Once you are busy with family and career there is only so much time for meals with friends. If you do have more opportunities to socialize with friends, oftentimes they will not harass you for ordering healthier options. 

Children are in the same boat. The occasional meals you eat at a friend's house or grandma’s is not enough to impact your health. Those who struggle the most are typically teenagers and young singles. They’re in the danger zone because at a certain age your friends become the most important people in your tribe. Eating out is often a major part of social life. And while it’s fun, poor nutrition and extra calories will always take a toll. 

Back in my day, when kids went off to college, we used to talk about the 'freshman 15.' Now, with oversized portions, it's more like the 'freshman 40.' It's the first time many young adults are away from home and making their own food choices, a challenge that affects anyone leaving home for the first time. Add in drinking and a lack of physical activity if they're no longer playing sports, and you have a recipe for disaster. While some young adults learn their lesson and shed the extra pounds gained after freshman year of college, for many, the struggle lasts for years or even a lifetime. Factor in the stress and anxiety of not feeling or looking your best during prime dating years, and the impact can be devastating

Navigating Peer Pressure

Ultimately no matter how supportive your tribe is, they may not support your healthy lifestyle. And if and when that happens you have to be the sun in your own universe. You may have friends, family members or coworkers who are uncomfortable with you changing your nutrition. If they have gone through their whole life believing that health is only for the genetically blessed, seeing you get healthy may be a blow to their preconceived notion. 

I've lost count of how many times I've heard someone tell another person they were 'too skinny' when they were still twenty pounds from their ideal weight. I've also witnessed friends trying to pressure others into taking a break from their health plan. While these individuals are not evil masterminds, their unconscious biases and suggestions can negatively derail the goals of their friends and family members.

Here's a test: if you mention the benefits of changing your diet and someone responds with, 'Let's celebrate with some ice cream or bake a cake to mark your success!' you might want to keep an eye on that person. They can still be your best friend, but it's important to realize that you may not be on the same page when it comes to lifestyle changes.

Again, it's important to remember that not everyone in your tribe starts on equal footing when it comes to health and nutrition. Some teenagers and young adults can eat whatever they want without any visible effects on their bodies. They might not understand that you may not be able to eat the same way.

If you are 5’4” don’t expect to eat like your 6’3” brother or boyfriend. Notice the differences between yourself and the people in your tribe. Imagine a young person who goes out to eat with friends twice a week and also begins dating. They are now going out with their date 2 or more times a week in addition to going out with friends and the pounds start adding on. 

Another example relates to immigrants. In my practice, I often observe three generations from a healthier culture. The seventy-year-old grandmother looks fifty and fit, the fifty-year-old mother appears thirty and fit, while the twenty-year-old daughter is overweight. This contrast highlights the impact of American culture, which often emphasizes indulgence in foods like double cheeseburgers and fries, on health and appearance.

Lastly, consider someone who is trying to quit smoking. Will the individual who smokes alone in their social circle or the one surrounded by smokers be more likely to succeed? Similarly, imagine someone advised by their doctor to overhaul their diet. Will they fare better if they're the lone healthy eater in their group, or if most of their social circle embraces their new lifestyle? 

When supporting a loved one needing dietary changes, strive to be the best influence in your circle. Support each other because at the end of the day we're all in this together.

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Part 4: Final Thoughts on Youth Sports