Willpower and Habits

“You are the hero of your own story”
- Joseph Campbell

Have you ever noticed people who have great habits? These people get up with the sun, exercise daily, read often, eat well, sleep well, practice gratitude, are successful at work, have a successful family life and even have an overall sense of peace about them. I am not implying anyone has a perfect life, but some people do seem to love the journey of inching towards perfection day by day. Are they genetically blessed or just plain lucky?  I would argue they had a small dose of will power that built one habit at a time until they improved enough for the world to see.  

For a long time, Babe Ruth was considered the greatest baseball player of all time. When he was young, he was told to copy a great player's swing. He said, “Shoeless Joe Jackson was good enough for me”. Many of us have mentors in our lives that inspire us to strive to be the best version of ourselves. Sometimes though, this is not the case and we need to study how people we do not know personally approach life. Too often we put celebrities on a pedestal instead of applying the lessons of both their successes and failures to our life. If you pay attention, mentors are everywhere. Whether you admire them or not, we can all learn from successful people. If you look closely, they are just normal people who continue to build habits. An example is podcaster Joe Rogan. He was just a normal kid with no money, no great skills, and no great educational credentials to his name. He started doing martial arts, which led to him having the confidence to be a comedian. The combination of these skills led him to being an announcer for the up and coming UFC and finally he started doing a podcast. He was curious about enough things that other people were curious about that he now has more listeners than the New York Times has readers. Whether you like his show or not, it is an amazing story. Take, for example, the late Jimmy Buffet, the ultimate beach bum. During his success in the music industry he wrote several books, got his pilot’s license, and started numerous successful businesses. The Williams sisters are another example. They were blessed with athletic ability, but it was the habits they built that made them both tennis champions. That would seem to be enough but they kept moving forward and became successful business women. The examples are everywhere of people who are successful in one area of their life and turn this into success in another area. Glance at the before and after photos of Jeff Bezos to see how he improved his fitness. The richest NFL player in history is Hall of Famer Roger Staubach who had even more success in the business world long before Magic Johnson and Shaquille O’Neil became business tycoons. Look for people doing it the right way instead of concentrating on the latest celebrity who got a divorce or fell into addiction. Using mentors can be the catalyst you need to start your own habits. Once you are willing to be curious and look closely at these mentors you will see they are regular human beings with talents and flaws, successes and failures. The difference may be they believe they can build habits.

“Watch your thoughts, they become words, watch your words, they become your actions, watch your actions, they become your habits, watch your habits, they become your character, watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”
- Lao Tzu

“Where there’s a will, there’s a way”
- Donkey from Shrek

Setting goals is great, but it is far more important to build the habits that make these goals attainable. Sometimes we subconsciously fall into good or bad habits. On other occasions we make a conscious decision to create a good habit. Will power is the spark that lights the fire. If you light enough fires you will change your life. If you change your life you may change the lives of many others too.

Neuroscientist, Andrew Huberman, explains that you can increase your willpower.  The anterior midcingulate cortex of the brain has been discovered to be the area that allows us to resist temporary pleasures such as eating sugary or fatty foods. In other words, this area of the brain plays a key role in delaying gratification thus allowing us to take on more difficult or long term challenges that will reward us in the future. It allows us to do something difficult like exercising, eating healthy or turning off the TV and reading which is difficult at first but gives us long term pleasure. The more you practice willpower, the more active this region of your brain becomes and you gain even more will power. As you become accustomed to these activities they become a habit. Once it's a habit it no longer requires willpower. The person who eats well or exercises likes the way they feel so they no longer need willpower to do so.  In order to keep challenging their willpower, they give themselves new activities. Huberman calls this introducing ‘micro-sucks’. The ‘micro-suck’ is Tom Brady improving his nutrition and fitness after he already became a Super Bowl winning quarterbak. It's Venus Williams going to her first business meeting after she was already a great tennis player. It could be you eliminating sugar from your diet or starting a walking program. 

Skip to the 01:14:54 time stamp for Dr. Andrew Huberman’s in-depth explanation of the neuroscience and neuroanatomy of brain regions involved in willpower.

Willpower lets you attack the ‘micro-sucks’. The ‘micro-suck’ becomes a habit. The habit becomes who you are. Many of us look at the Navy Seals in awe that another human being, the race of which we happen to belong, could accomplish these feats that require such physical and mental strength. In the modern world, it is impossible to avoid seeing people accomplish things in their lives. The leap of faith is seeing that this could be you. It starts with a small action like making your bed or going on a daily walk. The reward is not a great body. The reward is feeling slightly better. Walking becomes a habit. The walking becomes enjoyable and no longer needs any willpower to accomplish. So you add a little running or a diet change to add the ‘micro-suck’. The diet change becomes a habit and now you have improved your fitness and your nutrition and your overall health. The ‘micro-sucks’ start snowballing. You make habits that make you better at your job. You're happier at your job and you become happier in your relationships. You're so accustomed to turning ‘micro-sucks’ into habits that any bump in the road becomes just one more ‘micro-suck’ to overcome. 

Huberman notes that when you are sleep deprived your willpower diminishes greatly. This is why many experts will tell you to fix your sleep first. TheRealHouseMD website has information about sleep and will give you a start. Stress also diminishes your willpower. Many of us can improve our stress just by taking that first step. If you improve your sleep your ability to handle stress will improve. If you can start exercising your stress will improve. If you start eating better your stress will improve. If you stop reading politics and read TheRealHouseMD your stress will improve. Maybe making your bed is the start, maybe it is that first daily walk. Maybe it is making an appointment with a therapist or admitting to your primary physician you are struggling. The ‘micro-suck’ can be admitting the problem. 

Stacking behaviors builds even more habits. If you add the new habit to the old habit it is more likely to stick. Studies show if you add flossing after brushing you are more likely to build the habit than if you try flossing at another time. This means if you want to practice gratitude you do it while you're making your bed. If you want to learn about nutrition you listen to a nutrition podcast while you are walking. Ultimately, it is the story of the tortoise and the hare. The person who is unmotivated, struggling to get out of bed, eating fast food, never exercising, and hating their home life and work life does not become a success story overnight. The one who stacks habits one at a time and builds increased willpower day by day becomes the success story.

Another way to build habits is to set rewards. However, choose the reward that will help you build more habits. If you start exercising, reward yourself with new clothes or a vacation rather than a bowl of ice cream. Make the reward getting a puppy, and now you can take the dog on weekend hikes. Be mindful you are building habits to implement permanently. If you improve your nutrition to feel better and have more energy you will stay with it long term compared to improving your nutrition to look good on your beach vacation. If you exercise to feel better and have less stress you will be more patient and stick with your habit long term compared to someone who sets a goal like completing a marathon only to never run again.

If you stop scrolling on your phone and start reading or listening to educational material to feel better and improve your confidence you will realize rewards far beyond what you would have predicted.

The concept of the ‘micro-suck’ has been around for a long time.  It's very common to hear motivational speakers say “embrace the suck” or “choose your hard”. Dr. James DiNicolantonio, who is a health expert I follow online, stated it very well, “You can choose your hard up front or something harder down the line”. Working out can be hard, but being 50 lbs overweight can be harder. Meal prepping or spending more money on healthy food is hard, but having hypertension and diabetes and paying for medicines is harder. Studying is hard but limiting your career opportunities is harder. Being grateful, kind, and generous is hard but being sad and lonely is harder. Sitting down to pray or meditate is hard, improving your emotional stability is hard, but losing friends, family members and opportunities is harder.

“Men don’t fail, they quit”
- Jocko Willink

Once you get started building habits you will fail. The Tao Te Ching states you learn more from failure than success. Muhammad Ali said he was a better boxer after he got knocked down and had his nose broken. You may not be able to spend money on healthy food,  good; then learn to fast and spend your money on one or two healthy meals a day instead of three unhealthy ones.  Maybe you can not walk because your leg hurts or the roads are icy, good, then start doing pushups and situps inside. Maybe you get fired from your job, good, now improve and find a better one. Maybe your relationships are falling apart, good, that's a chance to improve yourself. You do not need to always use the toughest people on earth to see how they overcome challenges. Oprah Winfrey has had career success, steady relationships, and more money than she can ever spend in her life. Yet she has always struggled with her weight and her health. It appears she tried every diet and exercise program available with ups and downs but she never quit. Have you noticed she’s been at a healthy weight for years now? 

How is this related to orthopedics? The person with better habits will ultimately have less chronic illnesses. The person who sleeps well, eats well, maintains their body, and has developed habits to control stress will have less illness. When they are confronted with illness they will have more willpower and habit building skills to overcome the injury. Look at professional athletes. They made it to that level because they increased their willpower and built great habits. They routinely fall or in some cases are slammed into the ground and recover spontaneously where some ordinary people could take months or even be permanently disabled from a similar injury. On occasion, they twist their bodies into positions no human body can tolerate. After surgery, they return to accomplish feats no one expected because they attacked their rehab in the same way they attack athletic competition. The athletes are there for everyone to see and they can inspire all of us. I am fortunate to see less famous people do the same thing. I see the person who takes care of their health because they love their job or because they love taking care of their grandchildren. These people are not millionaire athletes. They are normal people who created a few habits that led to better health and improved life. It only takes a few choices, a few moments of willpower, a few simple habits, to move towards better health and a better life to be the hero of your own story.

“Four or five moments, that’s all it takes to be a hero. Everyone thinks it's a full time job. Wake up a hero. Brush your teeth a hero. Go to work a hero. Not true. Over a lifetime there are only 4 or 5 moments that really matter. Moments when you are offered a choice. To make a sacrifice, conquer a flaw, save a friend, spare an enemy, In these moments everything else falls away.”
- Colossus, Marvel’s Deadpool (2016)